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Lost

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(@adeolababawalegmail-com)
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Joined: 5 years ago
Posts: 3
Topic starter  

 

In the valley of the
shadow of death
On the road of loneliness
The bridge of confusion
Depression and fear dwell in mystery

In the World of
loneliness
Dred of friends
Overwhelmed with
emotions
Soaked to the bone of
confusion

Oh nature!
Help a man of straw
Helpless but
determined
Determiation is the
key,
yet frustrating to
acquire

Action painting
unknowledgeable
Gravedom knocking
earnestly
Helpless and
discombobulated

Grooooarrarrrrgh!
Oh helper
Why have you
forsaken the
helpless?

 

 

 

©Miss Crown Sarah


 

This topic was modified 5 years ago by [email protected]

   
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(@penkup)
Prominent Member Admin
Joined: 6 years ago
Posts: 862
 

A Review of "Lost" by Adeola Babawale

The poem is a picture of the absurdity of life. It expresses the conditions of the average man. The personae of the poem recounts the rigours "the helpless" encounter daily.

The title "Lost" is relevant to the body of the poem as it captures the condition of "the helpless" who seem to be plagued with an unresponsive helper. For this cause, "the helpless" are subjected to be "in the valley of the/shadow of death".

The personae seems to hang the plight of "the helpless" on the helplessness of "the helper". The personae is conscious that "the helper" has what it takes to change the condition of "the helpless", this could be adduced to be the reason behind the rhetorical question "oh helper/ why have you/forsaken the/helpless?"

Recommendations:

The form of the poem is inconsistent. If the poem were to be without punctuation marks it is understandable; this would mean the tone of the poet is that of anger. If the poem were ably punctuated, it would be understandable. The poet left some part not punctuated and some punctuated. It should be revised.

 

Lawal Eneye

This post was modified 5 years ago by Dr. Kennedy O. Obohwemu

   
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