HAPPY INDEPENDENCE DAY TO NIGERIA, THE GREATEST COUNTRY IN THE WORLD
Today is first October. Happy Independence Day everyone! Today, we are 59. Elders compared to some young’uns like South Sudan and South Africa. That South Africa sef. They’re like a rebellious, destructive teenager that insists on attacking a dignified elderly man. They don’t know that, as the proverb goes, what the elders can see sitting, the child cannot… you get the idea.
Anyway, at 59, this country has catapulted to the zenith in terms of great countries, rubbing and surpassing the likes of the United States, Japan, China, the United Kingdom.... What’s that I hear? We’re not the greatest country in the world? Why this is wrong. Very wrong. Let’s see the facts, shall we?
All the greatest countries have had a civil war in their history. The United States had their civil war in 1861-1865, the Chinese had their civil war from 1927-1950, and Japan had in 1868-1869. Hasn’t Nigeria had a civil war too? Hmmm? You see?
Also, the greatest countries have had army generals rule them. What’s that I hear you say? You mention the US, one of the greatest democracies ever? Wasn’t George Washington a general in the Army? He was America’s first president and he ruled for two terms. The United Kingdom had monarchs that were warriors. Our dear Nigeria has been ruled by MANY army generals. Elite, magnificent military men that cared passionately about the country. So much that they have had to make tough decisions such as annulling elections that were detrimental to the very fabric of the country. Forget the free and fair thing. That was just balderdash spread around by people that were jealous of our amazing political system. Again, Nigeria is currently being ruled by an army general. Only truly great countries can claim that honour.
Again, the greatest countries have leaders that are advanced in age. Donald Trump is 71. Xi Jinping is 66. How old is our own Big Oga? 76! The oldest of them all. And old= great and wise. It is known.
Wait o. don’t go. Can any other country claim the title ‘Giant’? Let alone Giant of an entire continent? But Nigeria, we’re the Giant of Africa. The person with the most titles is the greatest. Just ask Jon Snow in Game of Thrones. Do any of the US, China and so on have intimidating titles like ‘Giant of Africa’? ‘Uncle Sam’ doesn’t count.
So, with these few points of…. You have a question?
Why do we not have a great economy, working roads, a functioning government and so on? See lemme tell you, we cannot all be the same. If everything is similar, everything will be boring. We need variety. If every great country had good roads and all those things you said, what will distinguish one as special? Take this analogy, Messi and Ronaldo are both incredible footballers. Are they the same? One is short, another tall. One is Argentine, another Portuguese. But theyre both great. See? Isn’t this perfectly logical?
Therefore, I want to wish the greatest country in the world a happy 59th birthday. Permit me to use the expression of so many erudite wordsmiths on Facebook. WULLNP.
Precious Oluwatobi Emmanuel is a final year Law student of the University of Ilorin. He tweets @tobi_danni15 and Zuckerbergs at Precious Oluwatobi Emmanuel. He writes from Abuja, and Ilorin too.