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(@thessy007)
Member Customer
Joined: 5 years ago
Posts: 6
Topic starter  

She stands firm, like an old and ancient monument, having pride in Herself, with strange strength.

Some hundred years ago, an alien invasion occurred.

It wrecked havoc, but she was finally set free.

After this, the journey of suffering to glory began.

Green and white all around, displaying beautiful shades of colors like dancing maidens.

Two wild horses demonstrate her Strength.

She flows with milk and honey, and yes she seems promising. Yet leaders of tomorrow are slaves of today. Because ancient gods are still sitting like old women on their ancient stools.

An epidemic outbreak or probably a disease. An epidemic of destruction. Now she sings her anthem with lyrics of woes. 

Hijabs and crosses at two opposite ends. Far ends that seems like it will never meet. One against another, hugs with knives held at the back.

Will she ever recover from the alien invasion? 

She will! Oh! Yes she will!

She needs a ray of light to brighten up her path to glory. She shall rise and become the true giant of Africa.

 


   
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(@penkup)
Prominent Member Admin
Joined: 6 years ago
Posts: 862
 

Great piece! Just a few issues:

1. The title is misleading.

2. You used the synonyms 'old' and 'ancient' in the same line.

3. Your decision to begin the word 'herself' with a capital letter is unjustifiable. 

This post was modified 5 years ago 2 times by Dr. Kennedy O. Obohwemu

   
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